Pageant Husband

We opened the blog up to our current contestants and this beautiful piece was submitted by Rich (and Cassandra) Yoder - Mrs. Park County 2020


Pageant Husband 101

by Rich (and Cassandra) Yoder

     Two years ago, my wife was ready to come out on stage for the opening number when our one-year-old son decided to attempt an escape from the pageant venue. We laugh about it now, but at the time, I couldn’t say I blamed him. There I was, in my trusty cowboy hat and Wrangler jeans, out of sorts in the glittery landscape. It was only when I saw the pure expression of joy on Cassandra’s face that I recognized the value in what we were doing. Here are my top ten reasons why a man should not only tolerate his wife entering a pageant, but also encourage her to do so.

1. It allows her to make girl friends so I can have guys’ nights. The longer we are married, the more I realize that we are, in fact, each other’s best friend. We still confide in each other. We hang out, we laugh, and we sometimes make late-night onion ring runs. However, I am never going to get my nails done with her, and she is never going to enjoy Home Depot. Thanks to the Mrs. America organization, Cassandra has made friends all across the country. When she has girl trips, I get to meet up with old rodeo friends. Win, win.


2. It gives me an opportunity to meet other dudes in different cultural niches. We live in an extremely rural area. (Our neighbors are cows.) I love pageant week because, while the wives are rehearsing, the husbands have time to get to know one another and have fun. In the past, I have done Bible studies, gone to dinner, and visited around the pool. I even had the opportunity to tour a Major League Baseball stadium.

3. I get to be her pillar of support. There’s going to come a time when her feet are tired and pre-interview jitters are kicking in. That’s when I remind her of her “why”; I tell her she is strong and capable. It feels good when she leans on me, and those moments are perfect for pep talks. We are a team.

4. The evening gown competition. I think she is beautiful in her oversized tee shirts, old sweatpants, and messy bun, but it is nice to see her all dolled up every once in awhile. The evening gown portion is my favorite. When she slowly walks across the stage, it reminds me of our wedding day, and I see the light in her eyes. Even without a crown, she is already a queen to me.

5. The swimsuit competition. Since the birth of our son, Cassandra has lost about seventy pounds. She is passionate about working out and fueling her body with proper nutrition. The swimsuit competition gives her an opportunity to showcase her hard work, as well as her fun personality. (And come on, guys, who wouldn’t want to see their wife in a swimsuit?)

6. Through community projects, it gives us the chance to teach our kids how to serve. By delving into philanthropy, we have done some cool things together as a family. We have built sheds and donated the proceeds, walked 5Ks while pulling our son in his Radio Flyer, coached Special Olympics, and attended benefit auctions. One of the most important things we want to teach our children is to use our hands to give to others. Through these experiences, we grow into better human beings.

7. I get to “MacGyver” things. It always seems that women bring an excessive amount of stuff to pageants. Butt glue, bobby pins, band-aids. You name it, they have it. While I understand this prepares them for a variety of situations, someone has to carry it all. In my experience, this responsibility tends to fall on the sons, husbands, and boyfriends. One time, I was tasked with bringing my wife’s evening gown bag backstage to her dressing room. As I was walking through the hall, it began to get heavy, so I slung it over my shoulder. Little did I know, there was a small pocket towards the top containing her matching earrings. They promptly fell to the tile and broke into what seemed like a million pieces. After a temporary moment of crisis, I used my skills, connectors, and a pair of pliers to remedy the situation. They were as good as new, and this is now one of our favorite pageant stories. (It is only one example of the many times I have been able to use my creativity.)

8. It opens the door to fun adventures. If it weren’t for pageants, I never would have gleefully watched my wife in a celebrity stick horse race. We never would have discovered the best nachos in the world. We never would have shown our artful/embarrassing dance moves at the after parties. We never would have tried many new things. We never would have done so MUCH.

9. It’s (almost) as sweet as watching your favorite sports team. Yes, you tell her the scores don’t matter. You tell her that she should be proud of how far she has come and all that she has accomplished. You yell your lungs out and clap when she comes onstage. Somewhere along the way, you become invested in her journey and have a moment of panic where you ask yourself, “Am I… a pageant husband?!” Honestly, you want her to win, but you’re okay if she doesn’t because it is about so much more than that. It is a celebration of every woman.

10. She deserves it. In their day-to-day lives, wives and mothers have so much on their plates. They are nurturers, hostesses, teachers, leaders, lovable sidekicks, and life-givers. If your wife is like mine, she rarely takes time for herself. That’s why competing in a pageant is a wonderful endeavor. It is her time to shine. We encourage you to try this experience for yourselves. We’ve never had a single regret, and our lives have been deeply enriched. Please feel free to reach out to us on social media or email Emily through the Mrs. Colorado website. This is a journey you won’t want to miss.